I came to Japan from China from my 18 to study for almost six years. This year I graduated and went back to China, half a year has passed, but I miss Japan more and more.
I can get financial support from my parents in China. I can work at the company where my parents work and get an easier chance to move up. All in all, it looks like I can have a better living condition in China.
But I don't feel very happy. I didn't like both the political and cultural environment in China, and I didn't like the environment of the company my parents worked for. I could have gotten a job on my own in China. But whenever I think about being in China all the time, I feel a bit depressed and unmotivated to act hard (but if I think about working and saving money in order to get out of China, I'll be in a positive mood.) .
According to my research some western developed countries seem to have a better average standard of living than Japan. My reasoning is that even if I were to leave China I should go to a place with a higher standard of living. But the thought of going to another country doesn't make me feel emotionally motivated either, and the thought of the new effort I would have to put in makes me feel very tired.
I never felt that Japan was the perfect country, and I also had a lot troubles when I was in Japan. It is almost certain that I will live a more harder life in Japan than in China. Even after realizing all this, I still have a completely irrational feeling of wanting to go back to Japan. I don't have such irrational feelings when I think about going to other countries that “seem to be better than Japan”.
I'm very torn right now. I can say that emotionally I want to return to Japan. But my reasoning is that I should seek a place that can give me better living conditions. It seems absurd to make a decision because of some abstract spiritual benefits. Maybe when I return to Japan I will miss my leisurely life in china again.
I'd like to ask if there are any similar cases of people who gave up better living conditions (mainly about work) to move to Japan, what do you think and do you regret it?
by tixtorya