Hi
I’m work at hotel .
One day a white man asked to me that I want to stay one more night.
But that month had already fulled.
So I explained that.
Then he said me “can I say f*** “.
I was shocked , of course I know F word mean.
But I didn’t know what should I reaction to him.
I just pretended I didn’t notice what he said.
He would just say joke or he might think this Asian couldn’t understand english .
I don’t know what is true.
Anyway I want to know that is common foreigners say F word to staff so casually ?
Thank you reading my sentence.
I’m sorry If you think that sentence is bad.
my english grammar is not good.
by mmint45
38 comments
Generally just an expression of frustration. Rude, but not unusual.
I guess he didn’t want to say directly to you. He probably wanted to just express his frustration.
it is probably not uttered towards you but as an expression of frustration to the situation like when japanese say くそ etc.
it’s common. don’t mind it. the way he was probably saying it is equivalent to 「やばい」 unless he was directing it to you. don’t pay attention!
He asked you “can I say fuck”?
Sorry, it’s mostly an expression uttered at the situation/no one really, I used the word a lot everyday, but maybe I’ve used it directly at someone 2-3 times in my life.
From what you have written:
He is not saying Fuck at you, he is saying it at the situation.
Europeans and Americans have different cultures on this. But many cultures are relaxed. It can also be a way of connecting and bonding.
In some countries, especially in europe, these words are not very offensive. In other countries more offensive.
When people say “Can I say X” they are checking after they said something if it is socially acceptable. Or they are making a joke pointing out they already said it.
It’s a relatively common phrase/joke, that’s in lots of tv shows or movies.
Well if he asked if he could say it, then that was kind of polite lol. I would not be upset, it was not toward you but to his unfortunate situation, he expressed his frustration in a sarcastic way, from what I understand
The word: “fuck” is versatile. It can be used very liberally so long that intonation is right.
The “fuck-scene” from The Wire. : [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5ksTY6Dvf0](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5ksTY6Dvf0)
“Fuck” is rude but the tone of voice is important. Like やばい, it can be good or bad – depends on the situation, tone of voice, etc.
For me, I don’t like to use it in polite situations, like talking to hotel staff, but some people treat 99% of situations as casual. Some cultures, too, are more casual than others (as a Canadian, I notice Australians swear more than us).
Unless he is directing the F-word to you, then I would ignore it. If he said “Fuck you” angrily, then that is a verbal attack. “Fuck this” means he’s upset at the situation but not necessarily you.
It can be quite common to use fuck, especially in casual situations, most people will at least try to not use it too much in a business situation, but for some it’s so ingrained that they will use it whenever.
I can recommend the book “正しいFUCKの使い方”
That word is used in frustration, when someone is exhausted, or may not have enough words to really express how they feel.
The only time it’s bad or personal is if someone says ‘F you’ or ‘You (adjective) F’. It would be directed at you, usually with hard eye contact.
I remember being on a train platform in Tokyo, looking at the map, and after a week of frustration said out loud “Aww, what the F!” and almost immediately had a random person asked me if I was OK and needed help finding my way. They were genuinely concerned about me and making sure I could get where I was trying to go.
If someone is yelling this at their phone on a train platform where I’m from, everyone ignores them.
As a fellow white man who has outbursts like these, I apologize you had to experience that.
In america, it’s actually polite of him to ask if he can say it as some people do not like to hear it. It is also a way to show that he is just mad at situation but not mad at you. In America, most people would just say it in anger without concern for the person working. Typically they would at something like “what the f**k” or “are f**king kidding me”
some people work in garages and have the same for manners or lack thereof. But, is not typical, but it happens. I walked into a convenience store here down South in the US, typically conservative area, and the credit card had to be removed and reinserted and i stated i had to stick it back in. the female clerk said, thats what she said, a typical guys only joke, funny, but not expected or proper. She was from up North tho, i could hear in her voice. Is also, more common pending demographic areas like up North, are sharper tongued people in the US. and other areas also. on both sides, proper and not proper. But, definitely not all here.
Hey op this will explain every use of the f word I highly recommend
https://youtu.be/26UA578yQ5g?si=qMkfB_MX3pFC6vcq
Saying “Fuck” casually as a simple expression of frustration is immensely common among speakers that aren’t from North America. I use the word consistently daily, and not once would anyone mind since everyone else does as well. It can even be a common intensifier – i.e. “That was fucking awesome dude, fuuuckk… We’ve gotta do stuff like this more!” with a response being “Fuck yeah!”. Naturally, that’s a bit more of a juvenile conversation than 30 year old me would normally have anymore, hah, but as you can see – the word holds very little power unless directed at someone.
He almost certainly didn’t direct it at you but said it out of frustration at the situation. Like stubbing a toe. It may not have been ideal in a formal circumstance in a culture that values formality – but if people are less adept at adapting to their new circumstances, it’s not weird since it would definitely not be neither rude nor uncommon in similar contexts in less hierarchical less puritan English speaking countries. I could absolutely see myself answering “Fuck!” with a frustrated tone if someone said that the pool was closed in my australian resort, or something of that ilk. With no ill intent neither said nor heard.
I’m from Canada. Even though “Fuck” is a bad word and you would tell children not to say it, and you would avoid saying it in formal, religious situations, it is very commonly used casually and I wouldn’t take personal offense to it. “Fuck you” would be a direct insult. But there are better ways to insult people.
To be honest, it was rude, because “fuck” is rude to say in many settings, including the one you described. The word is incredibly nuanced and also really versatile in its usage. Based on what you’ve written, I don’t think it was aggressive. It sounds like he was just frustrated at the situation, not at you. There’s a big difference between “Fuck!” and “Fuck you!”. So no, it’s not the norm, but I also wouldn’t take it personally.
My take is that whilst he wasn’t happy that he could not stay one more night he was just trying to be friendly which was why he swore, but sort of apologised.
English is a funny (peculiar) language. From your description it sounds like he was frustrated but not directing it at you. Native speakers sometimes vent like that, don’t take it personally.
Also, your English is pretty good!
(Englishman here) I don’t think it’s rude, he wanted to show that he was really disappointed that he can’t stay longer. That’s actually praise for your hotel. Some British people don’t like swearing but some just use it as part of their friendly, casual vocabulary. When he asked if it’s ok, he was checking if he can be casual with you, since you’re strangers.
No big deal.
“Fuck” is a word that offends many, yet many Americans say it casually like “darn” or “crap” or other similar expletives. So, if some foreigner says “what the fuck?” or “Fuck that!” or whatever, it’s just something casual and it’s fine. If they say “Fuck you!” then you should be offended. I wouldn’t worry about it.
Then again, when I lived in Fukuoka, I remember seeing a Japanese guy wearing a hat that said “FUCKoka”, so it’s not that big of a deal, especially in Japan.
If he’s Australian, he’s probably used to inserting the word into every other sentence regardless of who he’s speaking to.
In America, yes saying “fuck” is very common and not too much weight is put on word. Just like shibal (씹할) in Korean haha
It depends on whether it’s directed at you or not, in this instance it doesn’t seem like it was directed at you.
That said I would not use that language in a foreign country where people might not understand it.
In this context, he was saying, “I know this isn’t appropriate to say, but I hope you don’t mind me expressing my frustration in the way that feels most natural to me right now. Please don’t take offense.”
This is a common phrase, especially in American English.
I say fuck all the time it’s not a big deal in the UK unless you’re a conservative, it depends how you say it
It is informal and casual, but not meant to be an attack. In America, it’s not unusual to commiserate with people working in positions such as yours, in that way, with the understanding being that we all go through these types of frustrations.
Don’t be too shocked if they drop the f bomb. What it means is more truly read in their attitude at the time.
In addition – don’t be hard on yourself. You communicated your story well, and that’s the goal of language. I think it’s great you can express yourself in English when it isn’t your mother tongue.
Here is everything you need to know:
https://youtu.be/G8yBn5VbY0M?si=4GdNxc1K5ITp7-Wu
U will not learn anything useful or meaningful from understanding this, It is better to not mind it & back to ur work, u did good 👍
From UK here I use the f word all the time, I use it like an adjective both positive and negative depending on the context.
Im hard pressed not to find someone use it tbh.
Obviously I don’t use it around children or customers etc.
Where I’m from we say the F word the exact same way you would say “あのー。。。”. Swear words just don’t have a huge impact in American English anymore. Slurs are much more taboo for us.
yes it’s very common for foreigners to use the F word casually, even very casually. Some even use it in every sentence that comes out of their mouth.
He just say f*, he upset with himself/ situation. He say f* you or f* off, he made at you (but not your fault).
“Fuck” = くそ・しまった・etc.
“Fuck *you*” = 死ね
big difference
he was most likely just trying to express frustration in a harmless way
it is generally considered lower class or uncouth to use the word “fuck” in formal contexts like talking to hotel staff, but it’s not rude or offensive
Where I live we say fuck every like 5 seconds (Canada) We have a daily quota to hit or our heads will explode.