Today I stumbled upon a youtube community post full of comments claiming that when Japanese women say “stop” during sex or in a sexual context, it really means “keep going” or “I don’t want you to stop.” The comments were full of lines like:
• “Yamete kudasai shouldn’t have this double meaning!”
• “Japan is so messed up for this.”
• (And even worse comments)
That’s dangerous half‑knowledge akin to a myth. “Stop” in Japanese only flips to “continue” in very specific words and contexts and NOT with “yamete kudasai."
(Explanations and examples see below)
I'm gonna use romaji for explanations because I think this is important for people who can't read any japanese to know as well!
Explanation:
Yamete kudasai does not have any erotic double meaning in japanese which is what people assumed. Yamete kudasai = Te‑form + kudasai = “please stop.” Unambiguously a polite but clear request to stop.
dame, yame, yabai, muri = Bare forms that literally mean “no good,” “stop,” “too much,” “impossible.”
In erotic contexts said breathily or with combative body language, they can convey “Oh wow, this is intense/too much (in a good way)!” just like English “oh fuck, this is too much.” Context and tone decide whether they’re a real refusal or a climax‑style exclamation.
These expressions are really not any different from what we have in english. "Dame" for example can have a double meaning because the word usually means "don't do this" or "stop" but it can also mean something like "this is not allowed/you shouldn't do this" (but that doesn't mean I dislike it) or "this is bad" but in the same connotation that we would in english also say "oh fuck this is bad I'm going to lose it if you continue = this is good please continue" it's the exact same thing.
It's not Japan being this overly weird country because we have the same erotic expressions and exclamation equivalents in english. However english-speaking people are aware of the nuance so they are not at all confused by this nor weirded out.
I also saw a lot of people in that youtube community post talk really negatively about how messed up or weird japan is for how "stop" means "continue" or people going like "women lmfao" and such comments without understanding how much context and wording is important and that we have the same sort of stuff in english but everybody knows what is being said or how it's meant.
Why this matters:
This is super important given how memed the phrase "yamete kudasai" is and that community post had some comments with over 1 thousand likes saying "stop means continue often in japan" despite this being half-knowledge.
Because of the popular meme from a non‑consensual hentai (“yamete kudasai” voiced over a rape scene) got passed around, many viewers now believe even “please stop” means “please keep going” especially added with the half-knowledge that "stop" means "continue." That’s false and it might endanger actual consent.
In any intimate real‑world situation if someone says “yamete kudasai”, they mean “please stop.” Trust it at face value.
Thanks for reading and in case you see these sorts of comments in the future I hope you can help clear these harmful misconceptions up.
by ArisClive