Hi everyone!
I will be attending a childhood friend's wedding in Japan soon – he's marrying a lovely Japanese woman (we've met a few times already), and from what I've understand, the ceremony will be on the traditional side. I'm incredibly honored to be invited, and since this will be my first time attending a Japanese wedding (and also visiting Japan!), I want to make sure I show up respectful and well-prepared.
Could anyone share tips or guidance on what I should know and do? Specifically:
- What kind of attire is appropriate for a female guest at a traditional Japanese wedding?
- How much should I give for goshugi (the monetary gift)?
- Are there specific customs or etiquette rules I should be aware of during the ceremony or reception?
- Any cultural dos and don’ts I should keep in mind… things I might not even think of as an outsider?
- Should I bring anything else aside from the monetary gift?
I really want to be polite and respectful, especially as a foreign guest, and avoid accidentally doing something that might be considered rude. Any personal experiences, advice, or resources would be so appreciated!
Thanks in advance 😊
by Queasy_Concert2054
1 comment
Wedding attire for female guests is a lot more modest than in the West. No strapless or spaghetti strap dresses. Dress should cover the knees. Your shoulders should be covered. Your hair should be up. No open-toed heels. You must wear nylons, no bare legs. No large purses or bags, use a small clutch or evening bag. Keep makeup light, but don’t go barefaced. Don’t wear white, black, red, or any bright or vibrant colors or patterns. You should not stand out and take any focus off the bride. Your goal is to be inconspicuous and blend in.
[Here](https://www.google.com/search?client=ms-android-kddi-jp-revc&sca_esv=8a70c10f7ae50c33&udm=2&fbs=AIIjpHxU7SXXniUZfeShr2fp4giZ1Y6MJ25_tmWITc7uy4KIeioyp3OhN11EY0n5qfq-zENwnGygERInUV_0g0XKeHGJIK02MUc5n41I8mJf-rA8r8I_YhMuy8z-aCRGcE7uxw_iHvx_7ilomORvEvaDkoR3aAZEbTfKffjehImv43zhO2Hkm2yzZ2s3DV8KjGdJ2CKLjX5IyzHNrA2KzCriSqGxmjVcLA&q=%E7%B5%90%E5%A9%9A%E5%BC%8F+%E6%9C%8D%E8%A3%85+%E5%A5%B3%E6%80%A7&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwitrt3u__uNAxVEnq8BHdKsEcIQtKgLegQIERAB&biw=417&bih=847&dpr=2.63) are examples.
For goshugi, a single person should bring 30,000 yen in three crisp 10,000 yen bills.
As far as manners go, at the reception, you should pour drinks for the people around you. They will pour your drinks as well. If you don’t want to drink too much, try to keep your glass full, because they will fill it as soon as you empty it.
You don’t need to bring any gifts, just the goshugi is enough.