More parents nowadays feel they’ve raised their children “normally,” yet their kids may blame them for their unhappiness. This series explores the root issues of family poverty and parent-child dynamics leading to the “8050 problem,” with insights from parents of the Lost Generation (born 1970s to early 1980s) or people directly affected.
We spoke with Yuichi Ichimura (a pseudonym), a 70-year-old living in Urayasu, Chiba Prefecture, who works in accounting at a care facility. His 38-year-old daughter lives at home and frequently changes jobs in the customer service sector.
The daughter, who once aspired to be a glamorous office worker in Tokyo’s Marunouchi area, faced a crisis at age 28 while employed at a black company, resulting in a suicide attempt that brought underlying family issues to light. Her mother labeling her as a “failure” deeply affected her, leading her to pursue nightlife work.
Yuichi recalls pressing his daughter about successful parenting, with his wife stating it meant “earning money and becoming independent.” He feels his wife lacks sensitivity due to her lack of professional experience, often speaking her mind without considering others’ feelings.
Despite initially attempting nightlife work, the daughter quickly lost her job, potentially due to an attitude of entitlement as a university graduate.
Yuichi offered his daughter a job through his connections, which she couldn’t adjust to and quit after a week. He expresses frustration that his well-intended actions backfired.
Family dynamics are strained, with Yuichi criticized by both friends and family. His son dismisses his attempts to reconnect, and his daughter seems to see him only as a financial provider.
Reflecting on his own achievements, Yuichi feels he’s given his children a privileged education and lifestyle, yet they still seem dissatisfied. He recently asked his daughter what she truly wanted, learning about her aspirations to work in Marunouchi like a stylish office worker depicted in dramas.
Currently, the daughter holds a part-time job at a drugstore. She’s lived at home, barely earning above 10,000 yen a month for eight years. Comfortable with her living situation, she doesn’t contribute to household expenses, which her parents cover.
Yuichi continues to support his daughter financially, giving her 50,000 yen monthly for activities, including her passion for anime. While his wife also shares this interest, Yuichi has mixed feelings but appreciates the happiness it brings.
His daughter shows no interest in marriage. Yuichi worries about future preparations, considering leaving her something substantial despite feeling disadvantaged compared to previous generations. He continues working, driven by parental concern for his daughter’s future.
by MagazineKey4532