For some context, I'm Japanese but lived in the US for my entire life. I decided to come here after graduating college to work in a research lab before starting med school (hopefully next year). I've got a job lined up for myself starting this summer back in the US (need for clinical experience for my apps). I'm sitting here in my room, by myself, hoping that I can one day live in this country again.
And I'm going to preface this by saying that I know not everyone has had this type of experience living in Japan.
But, I'm gonna miss living here. The culture, my heritage, and I'm just so grateful to have been given this opportunity. I'm just scared that if I become a doctor in the US, I'll never be able to live or visit here again, and I'd just hate for that to happen. I only have a few months left here, and I feel like there's just so much more I could have done in the past year (traveling, etc.), even though I've actually done many things that I thought I'd never be able to do. I can name so many great things about this country (convenience, public transportation, people, health care, my current job), but I can't seem to name anything I'm looking forward to when I go back to the US (besides my immediate family).
I don't know if this is a normal feeling to have or if it's a calling to just stay here. I think I'm just scared of the future and what it holds for me. Maybe I should give up med school and pursue a PhD in hopes of being able to have a more flexible job opportunity internationally? But I'm not sure how practical that actually is. Don't really know where I was going with this, but I just wanted someone to hear my thoughts haha
Edit: realized I could come back and get my PhD here. chat why was i literally being so dramatic 30 mins ago someone help me i sound ridiculous lmfaoo
by Acceptable_Rate_4717