I don’t want to generalize the whole of Japan and equate it to Tokyo but this was my experience.
In America, there’s a lot of talk about a lack of third places which causes less people to hang out or meet new people.
In Tokyo, every mall was packed with people. Even in more suburban areas in Chiba, or Odaiba I saw a lot of people chilling in malls, much to my surprise. Malls in America are all dead and I’ve seen some big malls close down.
Even in places like McDonalds which is kinda of a “trashy” place to hang out, it had more of an eloquent cafe vibe in Japan.
There are also bars/izakayas where people just talk to each other.
That culture doesn’t really exist in America. It’s mostly extremely old dudes and I’m also not really welcomed there as a young Asian guy.
Whenever I saw a foreigner, I would talk them up and it was a great time. I could never do this in America. I know foreigners in Japan would have the same interests as me, nicer/safer, and probably not racist. That’s probably the big difference maker for me.
The social “relaxation” I feel and with the abundance of third places, I ended up making a lot of friends.
I really don’t think my experience was from the rose tinted glasses of a vacation as I’m usually not social traveling in America. I’m very curious if any other people, especially Asian Americans felt the same way as me?
by parisvtg
8 comments
I believe this applies to tourists in general in any county. Fellow tourists are themselves very open minded and happy. I mean, if they weren’t, they wouldn’t have bought a thousand dollar plane ticket just to hate haha.
Also when you’re traveling, it’s more of living in the moment so you’re more open to reaching out to others and gushing about your travels/asking how theirs is etc.
That’s how I found it, anywhere I went regardless of the country.
> In America, there’s a lot of talk about a lack of third places which causes less people to hang out or meet new people.
You speak for all of America..? Do you spend all your time traveling all over America? This really just isn’t true. There’s so many places to meet people, especially if you live in a big city.
> There are also bars/izakayas where people just talk to each other. That culture doesn’t really exist in America
It exists lol.
> Whenever I saw a foreigner, I would talk them up and it was a great time. I could never do this in America
because you probably don’t want to. But you could make small talk with people. It’s pretty normal, especially in the Midwest.
> probably not racist
They’re racist. Realistically, most of the Asian countries are racist to an extent. They may not outright tell you to your face, but you‘re not very well traveled if you think otherwise.
If your definition of making friends is making small talk and being polite, then you don’t really have that many friends. Japanese folks are very polite, even if they don’t want to talk to you, but they are definitely not your friends, unless you‘re constantly hanging with them. But that’s just true for all cultures, not exclusive to Japanese people.
was it only with foreigners or did you also do it with natives?
Car-centered infrastructure, inequality, crime, and drugs have really gutted the United States of America. Compare to Japan’s public transit, 40% tax rate on top-earners, low crime, and low drug-use.
Much much easier to make lifelong friends overseas, ironically
Finding people to talk to isn’t too difficult if you’re an extrovert, but I do generally find making real, honest to god friends is a bit more work than the US, even if you’ve got strong Japanese language skills.
I found this to be true too. I didn’t talk to foreigners, but I would talk to many Japanese people with my elementary Japanese skills and make pretty good friends. One even invited me to stay in their family home in Niigata lmao
I’m going to go the other way. As someone who isn’t American or Japanese – the easiest country to talk to new people is the USA. Culturally America is just open and like to talk. That’s part of who you are. Its what every non American I know says when they go to the USA – doesn’t matter if it’s New York, Dallas, Atlanta, Denver.
I had a colleague who went to Denver and noted to some people from work he wanted to see the mountains and asked for an itinerary. People literally took him out on a Saturday and for some cool hikes / views. That’s just the USA – and honestly to me it applies across the board to everyone except those on Reddit.