How Teaching English in Japan destroyed my life.
[Please note that this may contain distressing content]
I've posted a few times on TeachingInJapan, but I want to speak more honestly about my experience. Because I didn't just hate it, I've been left with regular panic attacks, depression and self harm. Recently, I had to go to the hospital in my own country, because of what's happened. I really just don't care about any risks of future unemployment, or bounty placed on me, because other people's well-being must come first.
I was overjoyed when I got the email with an offer of a teaching position 'in Japan'. I got my visa done, booked the tickets, all seemed great, I could not have been more happier. But when I got to training I was struck by some things, all the management seemed like complete bulldogs, two, the complete lack of respect management had for us, often telling them about their luxurious lifestyles, PR, their family and mansions. These managers were bulldogs dressed as sheep. Nice, smily, polite on the surface, but only for their own gain. Underneath, were vile disgusting people who you could tell, were completely void of humanity.
Over the course of 6 months, I was degraded by management and customers on a frequent basis. Despite the Japanese philosophy of working hard leads to respect, instead I was treated like dog mess, since the foreign managers use an American performance based system to judge your work. I worked so, so hard but management don't care about it. Customers constantly complained over the tiniest details, often or not complaints conflicted each other you were subjected to degradation, one way or the other.
If you spoke up at work or caused a seen with your boss, their boss would step in, roast you and tell you that if it happened again, or you're fired.
So what actually happened, is that I wanted to move to a different part of Japan. In my circumstance, I was told that I had to meet the performance requirements to get the transfer. So what did I do? I started working harder and harder to get those standards, but things got worse.
A few months later, I found out that I was being involuntarily transferred to another school 30km away. It would cost me an extra 20,000 yen per month.
I lost all of my regular customers and I couldn't build up a new customer base. I remember how I had made a small comment about another teachers, teaching in the presence of one of the lower level management. Then as already described, the bosses boss, roasted me again and it turns out the lower level manager made up some petty bull tush to get me into trouble. Then I was told that I would be involuntarily transferred to a new location around 400km away
This was 400km further from the location I was working so hard to get there, since that is were my girlfriend lived. I was dumped by her a few days later. As a result of all the pressures, I had a mental breakdown and slashed my arms and face. I never bled or cried so hard in my life. I remember verbally abusing myself over and over 'stupid man', 'stupid, stu-pid man'. Customers hated me, management hated me, my once lover hated me, everyone in Japan hated me. I then got on my bike and attempted for the station. I don't know what would have happened after that, I had thoughts about suicide so if it wasn't for the person who stopped me from going further, I probably wouldn't be here now.
I ended up getting sectioned into a secure unit, no phone, no money, no key, no nothing, for 18 hours or so, sharing a room with 4 other random Japanese people in a mixed ward. Thankfully, the really crazy people were away, but I could hear them in the distance.
The next day, the highest ranking level of management visited the hospital as they were apparently the only person who could decide whether I could leave the ward. So I was whisked off from the ward, taken to the nearest branch and fired immediately on the spot, in the most softy soft way possible through a 'resignation'. I didn't really have a choice, otherwise I would not have got my remaining 10 days paid holiday, 2 weeks to leave my company owned apartment and no doubt the company would have roasted any future background checks for future jobs. This top boss, walked me out of the branch with his slouchy 'bad man' walk that he had, the type that gave you the impression that he knew he was The boss and got pleasure in making other know it, while the low level management were always high as a kite on energy, just to make sure nobody got promoted any higher than their entry level positions. We said a few last words, I walked off, looked back one last time. Boss never looked back.
Now was a countdown timer to leaving Japan. All was over, until I found out that my ex-girlfriend had complained about me to the police and I was summoned to the police station, having missed their attempt to take me right from my apartment. I got to the station, where I was searched, had my passport/ residence card details taken and made to sign by thumbprint, a written document. If I made any further contact this person, I was told in firm terms about 4-5 times “you will be punished under Japanese law”. In simple terms, I would have faced hostage justice, a prison sentence and then deportation, resulting in a ban from entering Japan.
So there I was, I had crash and burned and yet still, I was treated as something so low, I don't think dog mess, even justifies it. Absolutely everyone had turned my back on me in an instant in the most evil of ways, even the person I had loved so much, who could not have cared less, seeing me lose my job and banged up in a Japanese prison. I can't really put it into words, satanic might be a start.
I went from a smiling, happy person to completely broken, soulless and financially broke. Right now I have less than $30 in my bank. I've not left my parents house for over half a year. For about 2-3 months, self harmed everyday. My Father tried to commit suicide himself. I have been left feeling worthless and unable to do work. I've been unemployed for months and so I've now got to explain a huge gap in my CV, which employers will just toss. Even as recently as a few days, I've been self harming and had severe panic attacks resulting in hospitalization.
Anyone who is thinking about coming to Japan, because they are so desperate or because they have some kind of baseless dream, really needs to think about what could happen to them. I have no clue at all, what I'm going to do with my life now.
At this very moment, my 'dream' about Japan is one with a glossy, shining bright surface, full of satanic vileness underneath.
by Substantial-Host2263